Posts Tagged 'Uncategorized'

Yay for the boys who sing about big girls!

I’m so proud of my brother!!!!! He won his school’s talent contest with a cover of Mika’s Big Girl…. And he’s eleven!

He also got his first rejection from a girl in school last week, so rockin’ it out on stage was a huge thing for him to do even though he was quite depressed. He absolutely loved it. He now wants to learn to play the guitar. He’s been taking saxophone classes and hating it (his absolutely horrible teacher has more to do with it than I think he realises. The guy just can’t explain anything in an understandable manner, and when the kids don’t get it, he just starts the same explanation, only now in a yell. I know, I’ve watched him do it, and not just to my brother).

So, after hosting living room comedy shows since he was about two, he’s now branched out into music in school. Good for him.


A work in Progress, or My Diet

Intuitively, I’ve never believed in dieting. I’ve never been the skinniest person in the world, and I’ve thought in the past that being skinnier would be better, but dieting has never made  sense to me. I’ve been told I could stand to lose a little weight, but dieting, in my mind,  isn’t going to fix the ‘problem’. I’ve been told I’d be happier if I were lighter, but I don’t believe dieting is a cure for unhappiness.

I have never been on a diet.

But in the past I’ve not told anyone my opinion on dieting. I was afraid people would ridicule me, so I just nodded along with their dietary advice, all the while thinking “yeah, yeah, sure, whatev, no way I’m getting into this.” And then I didn’t diet.

Sometimes, I lost a bit of weight, and people would ask me what diet I had followed. At this point, I’d mumble something about eating more veggies and less sugar (usually true, I guess), but I would be really uncomfortable. Because I’m not sure. I’m not sure because I don’t keep constant track of my food. Because just like I’m terrible at remembering what clothes I had on on previous days, I honestly don’t remember what I had to eat two days ago. It’s just not something I need to keep in my brain, when there’s so much to remember already.

I also don’t like the “how much have you lost”-question. Honestly, I have no idea. I have scales somewhere, but they’re packed away in a box, because I don’t use them. A few years ago, I wasn’t too comfortable in my skin, and thought I’d try to lose weight by excersizing more (I temporarily had more time on my hands), and my dad came up with the gem of “you should be weighing yourself every morning and night and you should count your calories.”  Yeah, sure, if you really want to drive yourself nuts, go see the weight go up and down and up again, and then punish yourself with less calories in, because you gained 2lb in one day… But to make him happy, I went out and bought scales. Even used them a few times on a weekly basis. But my weight was not what made me feel bad about myself, so I decided to stop measuring my value and happiness by it.

I am not on a  diet.

But it’s easier for me to let people assume I’ve lost weight through dieting, rather than through being too busy to eat or just for no apparent reason. There’s enough things I worry about every day, enough self-esteem issues to work through, enough insecurities to overcome without having to worry about what I put in my mouth. I eat what I like, when I want to (or get the chance). However healthy or unhealthy.

I won’t ever go on a diet.

And from now on, I plan on telling people just that. Next thing is to stop worrying I’m the fattest person in the room.

Well, a new blog for me!!! (or something)

I’m not sure why I want to start a new blog now, but I feel I have something to say about life, and this might just be my chance. I hope to write about, and with, respect for others. I hope to write about how it’s alright to for you to be just who you are, and for me to be just who I am.

There. Now I’m going out to live my life for a while, and maybe I’ll tell you about it.

January 2019
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